How Do You Know You Are in a Healthy Relationship?
Every time one considers getting into a relationship, there’s a list of pros and cons that we weigh. Not just about the person and their traits but about being in a relationship too.
In this period, we’re often informed by our loved ones of what we must protect ourselves from. What are the red flags? How can we avoid them? Who can we speak to when we see these red flags?
But we’re not told what reasons we should look for to stay in a relationship. What are the green flags? How do we know this is good? Instead, we stew in the anxiety of being in love and keep asking ourselves whether they “love me or love me not”.
Watch for these green flags in a relationship to know you’re doing okay.
When a relationship is going at a gentle pace, and you both are taking the time to get to know each other, you are in a good place. Often, relationships that begin overly affectionate or with a lot of “love bombing” don’t end well.
While romance tends to be a whirlwind, that is not the case with love. Love takes time to brew as you and your partner get to know each other. A pace that won’t overwhelm or pressure oneself to do what is uncomfortable is healthy.
Relationships often involve people who are very different from each other, uniting to be a part of each other’s lives. Mutual respect keeps people together no matter how jarring the difference may seem.
Respect involves respecting your interests and work and understanding where they come from in a disagreement. Care involves a mature acceptance of the people you are and loving each other for their difference. Not despite it.
Trust is the foundation of any relationship. But in a romantic relationship, trust is needed across many spaces — whether it’s about fidelity, finances, parenting, or more. A relationship with confidence is one that you can rely on for as long as you’re together.
With social media and cell phones, many may feel tempted to check on their partners and see what is under the hood. But trusting relationships involve putting trust first and replacing paranoia with clear communication.
While romantic relationships are some of the most intimate ones, setting boundaries is how you take care of yourself and prioritise your individuality.
Often, in a good relationship, you will notice that every time you set a boundary — it is respected by your partner. They will be mindful of your reasons for selecting them instead of pushing them and getting you to give in to what they want.
A good relationship will see partners being in sync with each other. But beneath that, there is also the independence to be their person.
Hyperdependence is an easy way to stunt your growth in the long run. A good partnership requires you to grow beyond your current self and improve. Healthy relationships allow you to have your interests, friends, and commitments outside of your relationship.
Remember, your identity is not tied to whom you’re dating.
Ability to Resolve Conflicts
No relationship is entirely devoid of disagreements or conflicts. Even the ones you think don’t fight days when they cannot seem to be on the same page.
But what makes a relationship strong is its ability to set differences aside and come to solutions as a team. A couple that lets conflict brew or doesn’t communicate their feelings when they are hurt is headed for trouble.
You will realise that most disagreements in a healthy relationship are resolved quickly because you and your partner are committed to understanding each other and getting to the root of issues instead of dismissing disagreement as red flags.
It’s not just how one handles interpersonal relationships but also how they take the relationship with themselves that shows how ready they are to be involved with a romantic partner.
When people are aware of their patterns, positives, and negatives, and they have a healthy relationship with themself, they will be more intentional with their relationships. You will see a sense of commitment towards building a relationship free of stress and one with a lot of respect. It also means that they can recognise when they are contributing to issues.
Space to be Vulnerable
There are no mind games or tests in an excellent relationship to see if your love is true. Your heart is on your sleeve regarding your partner, and your feelings are laid out for them to see.
Your affection will seem effortless with them, no matter how scary it may seem to admit to it. Similarly, you’ll also be able to address your fears and your issues with them without the fear of being judged.
For real intimacy to develop, you need to be vulnerable. When you withhold your emotions or are afraid of intimacy, you stop the relationship from growing — which may not be healthy in the long term.
It’s Just a Lot of Fun
Most importantly, you will be able to have a good time together. Relationships can get severe because people take themselves more seriously than they should. Our fears and anxieties take over, and we forget to live in the moment.
You need someone who will not just be able to help you have fun in the present moment but also give you reasons not to take yourself seriously without being dismissive of you.
You should be able to have a good time with your partner, and the idea of being around them should not stress you out. Instead, it should cheer you up and make your day!
The quality of your relationships is directly related to your health.
Toxic relationships may cause mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, and more. It is not worth being with someone you love if you are also unhappy and unhealthy. Seek positive relationships that show these green flags and give you reasons to stay.